My Health, My Faith, My Peace........

Galveston Beach

Over the last few months I wasn't feeling very well but I just thought I was getting old, I then started to have a lot of pain and was finally convinced to go to the doctor. I'm more of a God heal me kind of person so it was really a miracle to get me there. As I found out that I had blood clots in my lungs and more than a liter of fluid had to be drained off of my right lung. I was blessed to be alive as if the clots had moved I could have died. I have been poked prodded and bled to see what caused it to find out they don't know. over $45,000 it costs but I'm alive and now on the mend. I am on blood thinners and just finishing my second course of steroids but I am so at peace.

Through this whole time I have only experienced moments of fear, no more, the rest of the time I have felt, blessed, loved, cared for and just plain peaceful. I know that God saved my life and is looking after me and it's set me free that wee bit more. Which is so good.

At church after coming out of the hospital I just felt so humbled to be able to say thank you to my God.

This past Sunday I just wanted to shout so I did, I sang louder coz I could, and worshipped my friend. That's what He is my friend, yes God but He didn't heal me He got me to the doctor, very strange, why I don't know, maybe I have to trust people not just Him, who really cares yes I want all He has for me but I felt loved. God is my carer. I trust Him with my life. How cool not that I'm invincible but just taken care of. LOVED!!!

I like life but apart from leaving all the things I want to do and not wanting to see my family sad not to have me and to take care of them, it would be so cool to see God and hang out. He likes me how cool is that, warts and all. I have so many flaws but He loves me. I can't grasp it but I feel it. I don't have to see stuff I just have to be with HIM...

I am closer to my goal of freedom. People, bless em, don't have to get me, I don't have to please them, I just have to love and be loved. WOW!!!! God is definitely great.

I went to the beach, I love the beach, even with this body I now have, 75lbs heavier than when John was with me. But I just swam, sang, floated out in the sea for a long long time having my quiet time with Jesus, except it wasn't all that quiet ha ha. Freedom, just to be..... I felt so happy, at one point after John left I wondered if I ever would be happy again, wow God has really healed me, I feel so much JOY, which is an experience not just a feeling. It comes because , through and with Jesus. I love it.

Thank you Lord for giving and keeping me in LIFE. You are awesome and I love you so much!!!!!!!!